Success

So I've been thinking a lot about success recently. A combination of my 5th year college reunion and having most of my projects in Lakeview wrapping up.

5th year college reunion was sick. A moment like no other. College with perspective, maybe. I really felt like everyone there was there and able to embrace it. No one was too cool. Maybe one person. But pretty much everyone did it and did it well.

I can't believe that it has been five years since graduating. I guess when I think back to all of the places I've slept, articles I've read, fun I've had, bad times I've had then yeah sure its been five years. Vinalhaven seems like forever ago... I think its more crazy to think that it was 9 years ago that I moved into Clark 111 and met some many people that I hold close to my heart.

Anyway, at Reunion there was a panel of five "successful" classmates. It included a lawyer (a girl who had gone to law school straight out of college), a children's book writer (who family funded the printing of the book on under their own name), a woman who had been a child actor and has continued to be an actress as a grown up, a nyc blogging comedian, and someone else. I forget. I didn't attend. But I was sort of put off by the idea of it. A group convo would have been more appropriate. You know we all sit down and talk about what success is and why we think we have achieved it or whatever. I was (obvi) pissed I wasn't asked to speak on the panel.

It also made me think about what success is to me. I am not really sure. I am headed to graduate school in the fall. That may be part of it. I skied 31 days this year. That may be part of it. I caught two 25 inch rainbow trout last week. I also caught countless brook trout on dry flies (a first.) And that counts too. I think.

Here is wikkipedia's take on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Success

And those guys (we) don't even have a definition.

And now at work I am writing reports about all of my projects here. And again I am like wtf. Yes things did happen. I started two farmers markets, trained community members to lead programs, taught 3 adult ed classes, taught in the high school.... So I was successful. Should I sit back and smile and have a Cinder Cone. I don't know.

And what makes it more confusing is knowing folks around here and how f-ed they are. Yes there are farmers' markets for folks to sell things but is there life overall is not changing. They are poor, they have kids in Iraq, kids in jail and can't afford bail, meth problems, the price of gasoline for their old cars and pickups is only getting steeper....

I wish success and feeling good was as simple as it was in high school. You made the team. Yes, congratulations. You got an A on a French quiz. Nice, lets have pizza. You were elected to the student council. Great. You got into college early descision. Awesome, your hard work has paid off.

Things seem a bit more complicated now. Or maybe its that now no one really cares. Or maybe I don't let anyone define it for me anymore. Or maybe I have already arrived and am success. And its the norm.